Parents going through a divorce understand that even if they can lead healthier lives without one another, their children might not have an easy time understanding their decision. Thankfully, there are actions you can take every day to make your child feel more comfortable.

Here are three ways you can help your child keep an upbeat mentality and live a healthy life:

  1. Filter your thoughts

Something you might not think will directly impact your child is your attitude toward their other parent. If you make negative statements about your ex around your children, then they may take your words to heart, have a weak relationship with the parent you speak poorly of or even develop self-esteem issues. Instead of speaking without a filter in front of your kids, consider speaking directly to your ex or finding support through friends or therapy instead.

  1. Encourage play and creativity

There are activities you can engage in together or sign your children up for that may help them cope. Chatting with a younger child about their feelings while playing a game or drawing with them or simply letting the activity be an escape may be beneficial. Similarly, older kids who have extracurricular activities, like sports or music lessons, to look forward to might develop a more positive outlook on life.

  1. Sync up household routines

Having some similar routines and expectations for your children between their two homes can help them in more ways than one. For example, having the same bedtime for your kids each night, no matter where they sleep, can help set your children up for success and make them feel safe. This is because ample rest often allows people of all ages be more attentive and make the most of their day. Plus, consistency between both dwellings may help your child feel more at ease with their new lifestyle.

Remember not to assume your child is in a healthy mental space just because they haven’t complained or acted out. Be sure to check-in with your children in the days leading up to your divorce and months after.